Confident Product Managers

Very few things irritate me more than confident product managers. PMs that can fake confidence even though uncertainty abounds get on my nerves. I guess it’s because I’m not one of those Product Managers.

Folks like Jason Fried, DHH seem to never talk about their anxieties on Medium. Neither does anyone else frankly. Just like Facebook shows you everyone’s brighter side of life, Medium posts by PMs and founders show off their confidence in predicting the future. Very few PMs or designers talk about the forks in the road and the many paths they could have taken and how they all looked reasonable and defendable.

They don’t talk about organization realities that did not allow them to pursue their vision. They do not talk about the lack of resources or the lack of talent in the organization. They do not talk about building alignment in an organization. And, how hard and often unrewarding that is. They don’t talk about uncomfortable conversations. They don’t mention crucial decisions taken because someone with more cache in an organization wins over data. Or someone with better copywriting and presentation skills wins over rationality and how that is ok.. because its perceived as passion.

They don’t talk about long plane rides full of anxiety and the prep work before these crucial conversations. They don’t talk about the constant pitch deck rewrites and narrative changes. They don’t talk about the challenges of being remote or away from the HQ and trying to push for ownership on larger initiatives. They don’t talk about the VPs and Sr. VPs that have never met customers but have a POV on the UX of your product. They don’t talk about how hard it is to stay positive and optimistic amongst all of this. They don’t talk about how difficult it is to not order that one more cocktail on an expense account on many a dark evening. And, how hard it is to pick yourself back up again.

Coz’ that would be a downer wont it. Why be a downer?

Sorry if this seems like a bit of rant but It needs to be said. Product managers, especially in large companies need to know that their job is hard and why it is hard.

I am much more comfortable being vulnerable. But, I often wonder if this sits well with executives or if it just makes me look weak. Many books and articles talk about faking till you make it. I don’t think that works for me. Wouldn’t you be better off stating risks and assumptions and being vulnerable? I guess not. Your engineering team, your designers, peers and stakeholders are looking up to you for leadership, confidence and guidance. Which is why to me, confidence in a PM is just like an oil spill on an ocean of anxiety. Or the 1/10th  of the iceberg floating in an ocean of uncertainty.

Why don’t we acknowledge this reality? That this is the craft of product management.